Notes on Shopping

I took my mom to the Nutcracker Market here in Htown this weekend. For those readers (if I have any left) who aren’t familiar, its kind of like a …… Well. Hmmmm. Words fail me. Its like a huge craft fair, only its not just crafts. Or Christmas stuff either. Like maybe a big mall, only the distance between stores is measured in shuffle steps? No, that kind of fails too. I don’t know. It has to be seen to be believed. Maybe the best way to describe it is to tell you about the stuff we picked up? Items purchased by mom and I included but were not limited to: a sweater (no Christmas themed sparkly appliqués were on it, but those were available too), a big feathery snowman, some weird sock looking thing you put in the microwave, and a heavenly concoction called “Cowboy Butter” (more on this later). Yeah, I guess that kind of sums it up…clothes, Christmas, strange inventions, and food. Yummy, yummy food.
This was both mom and I’s first go-round at the Nutcracker Market. We had a couple first impressions:

1. Not to sound like a snob or anything, but paying up for the priority shopping from 9am to 10am (when they open the doors to the masses) is totally worth it. Ok, we didn't really pay for it, the tickets were free, but if I had to pay I still would have. I am not really a big shopper. For me personally, the only thing worse than a full day of shopping is a full day of shopping in a crush of people. In fact, we missed one whole row because by the time we got to it, there were more women than at an NKOTB concert. I don’t care how cute something is, it’s not worth taking a hip check from a lady wearing 3 inch heels and wielding her Louis Vuitton like a mace.
2. Oh and while we’re talking about the clothes. When someone tells me I’ll be shopping for 6 hours, the first thing that springs to mind is ‘I wonder if I can get away with wearing my crocs’ Don’t worry I didn’t risk it, and thank goodness. I already felt like the queen of frump in my Old Navy sweater, black pants and ballet flats. I mean seriously. These women were dressed to the nines! I felt like pulling one of them aside and asking what was on the memo I didn’t get. I mean, was JT watching us on some closed circuit television? Were the casting agents for the Bachelor there? Alas, I think their only purpose in looking super fancy, was making us lesser peons feel schlumpy. Mission accomplished.
3. Serving alcohol to shoppers is genius. I didn’t succumb to it much this time, but I have been known to attend similar shopping functions with certain people, and waking up the next morning thinking ‘I MUST have been drunk to think THAT was cute’ It’s the married version of beer goggles.
4. The most intriguing booth at the Market was the Cowboy Butter one. These guys had to, by far, be making more money per square inch of booth than any other vendor there. The product was an amaretto, honey, pecan mixture that was the consistency of cinnamon bun frosting, and was pure heaven. The booth was about the size of the closet my stackable washer/dryer is in. I have no idea what expenses these two little ol' guys that were running the booth have, but they had to be clearing some serious jack. I figure their biggest overhead item had to be the biscuits that they were giving samples out on! I mean, they didn't even waste time supplying bags for your purchase. They knew it wouldn't stop you from buying it and throwing it in with your other goodies, so why waste the money? The whole business plan was pure genius.

On another note, we have internet back on the Halfstreet. So expect regular updates. Well as regular as ever I suppose.